My mother is a home keeper & hence has always had to ask for money from my father. My father on the other hand has always been rather tight fisted. His way has always resonated with the “Penny-wise, pound-foolish” saying. There is no judgement here, people are the way they are because of their experiences & many other factors.
One day I watched my mother asking my father for her monthly allowance which mostly went into the house expenses. Despite the amount she was asking for being rather small in my view, my father went on his usual-like response by making excuses about his expenses and asking her to take all his money and to start handling the bills. Off-course, hearing that once again my mother brushed it off & told him to “forget it” as she didn’t want to hear it & didn’t feel like taking the money after that.
The next day while I was sitting with my mother alone, I gave her a big bundle of cash, significantly larger than what she would use for herself & for the house expenses for over a year. As I handed the money to her, I told her that she should use it in any way she likes and that she should splurge and not worry about it. I made it clear that when it was close to running out that she should let me know and I would happily give her more. She was indeed very happy.
Several days later, while sitting with my parents in the room. My mother once again asks my father for money and once again it went into their usual story of him feeling his expenses are already too high and her feeling frustrated that he was not giving her money.
As I watched this, I was absolutely dumbfounded. I kept trying to understand why she would even put herself into that same frustrating situation that she has dealt with for decades, especially now that the “problem” was resolved. I kept wondering & I just could not understand why she would ask him for money again, especially just a few days after I gave her a large sum.
Once my father left the room, I reminded my mother that I gave her a big amount of money and that I told her to spend it in any way she likes. I also shared my confused emotion with her asking her why she would put herself into the same situation again since her problem was solved and since she knew the result would be the same! She was complaining about money & now she had more than enough, what was the problem?
My mother then once again vented her frustration with me & explained that she was right in asking him because “he is my husband and he is supposed to be giving me money for the house expenses”.
BOOM!!! – A HUGE REALIZATION IMMEDIATELY DAWNED ON ME.
I wanted to help my mother solve a problem which I felt I had the solution for. The problem being a lack of money, the solution being a large sum of money. However, this did not solve her problem. Her problem was clearly EXPECTATION! She expected my father to give her the money and hence the problem was never really the money alone.
The story from God:
There was an old door. The hinges were worn out & were in a very condition. Every time the door was being opened, it would only open a little bit & make loud creaking noises. It would open just enough for a few fingers with a few dollar bills to go through.
Seeing this, God decided that it was time for a new door to be given. This new door opened wide & now not only would a handful of dollar bills be able to go through anytime but there would also be an unlimited supply of dollar bills available.
However, after enjoying the new door for a brief time, the decision was made to go back to the old door and to try to make it work!
In similar ways, in our own lives we face many frustrations & challenges in our relationships and off-course, other areas of our lives. How much of our issues arise from expectations? Do we sit in quiet to reflect and understand what or where our problems are stemming from? Perhaps God has opened another door for us but we are not sitting in silence to realize or see the solutions that he is giving us?
Easy Humanity 
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